6:23 delirium by timothy

onthebottomnow. i looked at the wall. breathing and wavy. collapse at the centre. shes only a child says he. innocence and peppermints. a head full ov glory. i took the silken hand into my hanging flesh, and walked timed, perfect, machinelike, into the shadows (behind the sun). at this point the girl had gone (grown now). i pierced the flesh with my finger. choked and cried. i asked to be tied. crucified. just die. thats all, just die.

instinctoverwill. hello christ, have some tea. i sipped it and looked interested. i can lie to any ov you. this is reality. sleepy-eyed and disintrested, the figurehead fell off my cloud. tea for unity. i told you where i stand margaret, stop coming closer. she pushes off. i twist, and turn. falling... the world spins and stands still. a man and his mouth, open . frozen in terror, and joy. moving through nothing. cum here, i've been waiting.

togetheragaininthehereandwellnow. margaret sip the bitterpill. i took out my tin ov bitterpill, closed her eyes, and took her away. her hair hangs from the head ov a pin. its all stagnant now. can you feel the rot? i am the source. feed the disease, before it spreads. i spread myself on the face ov eternity. the scent floated through the window ov the soul. scrape my eyes. theres the faith. faith in my eyes. vision in my soul.

takeitawayideservethesethings. with nothing i move all into everything. the walking rods. the flesh hung like shit and filth. i trancended/transversed the mold. she made me cry. i asked the brother, to keep me sane. i've never held a razor, yet my scars are deep. we whored along the avenue. looking and leaning. the smoke hung over me. "to what end?" i asked. peter turned, and looked into my eyes. "to what end?" said he. the words rolled off his tongue . "to no end." no end. i looked stoically into the storm.

hereswherethestorybegins. i had conviction, i had description. find the man, kill the myth. i knew how to find him, before i had to look. jesus. mary. joseph walked in on me. i looked at him. he looked at me. i said nothing and left. i have nothing. to go on. there was a gun, on the table. i lifted it. swallowed it. and spit it out. out the backside. into oblivion. i walked like a man. i cried like a child. and fell like a hero.

iawokeeventually. i was in a prison. the walls were thin. open door. i moved not. instead i reveled. reveled in myself. the walls were wires and i a spark. slowly. surely. at exactly 6:23. halfway there. on the other side. ov town. a man walked in. poured cofee. and proceeded to shoot. those murdered. mother.father.sister.brother. they are with god now. all dead. straight through the universe. and the space between. is where i roamed. tick.tock. tick.tock. the swinging is stopping. "to what end?" truly. to what. but the end.

ilookedintotheheartsovthosetrulyliving. the church was old. solitude. i cried at the sight. a man on a cross. he is the cross. he is the burden. i am only a man. a.single.man. they killed him. for a reason. theres always a reason. back in my mind. i realized i am unpure. so i created that which i am not. the ideal man. the imaginary man. it was here. i found christ. we exchanged glances. mirror. he stepped. i stepped. we all stepped. i scream. he screams. we all scream. i reached down to touch him. and all was black.

pleasedon'tletthedawnbreak. i was a child. all the possiblities ov infinity. i was always weak. i went to father. father.son.theholyghost. lead me not into temptation, daddy. i am like them. i said. like whom? said the man called. "daddy". like those who are like no other. i am not like you. like me? said the man called. "daddy". yes like those who are same. the world is split in two. i drooled. in many twos. i dreamt. us.them. the seed is planted. i reaped. he sowed. i wept.

wheredoyoufindyourimagination? i was naked. perched. on my pedastal. this is where i go when they leave. this is the only place i truly exist. bloody. mary arrived. he is not your sin. sin. filth. this is where i truly exist. get out ov my head. i screamed to an empty room. self. imposed. solitary. confinement. i turned myself inside out. i scraped a rusty hand over the wounds. infection. this is where i truly exist. its like falling. i tried to recall. exactly what i was supposed to do. who sent you? why are you here? fear. i exist in perpetual fear. you called. you called. you forced me here.

pleasedon'tpushmeaway. i crawled inside. you left it open. i finally got the fingers out. freedom. floating in your embriotik sack. your nourishing. your rot pours down my. embillical. life. i suck it up. i suck it up. up i suck it. the womb. is dark. all is dark. i am blind. impressionable. get your fucking fingers out. your body rejects me. you reject me. i am forced down the tunnel. there is no light. there is no. light. you heave me out. vomit and sin. i am but a man. a man. not your child. i look deep into your lies. the window to your soul. christ is but a fantasy. you were my reality.

emptyandhollowbornagain. my hands were clenched. into fists. fits ov sadness . shaken and shaking. i put myself on display. propaganda. the way the light dances. in your eyes. she takes me into her mouth. spit it out. spit. she swallows. she consumes. never may you have it back. never. every little destruction counts. if you leave. what will i have. i gave it all to you. i gave it all. she trys to give it back. "never may you have it back". all things cannot be recovered. she turns. she leaves. she never looks. back. never may you. never may you.

atexactly6:23idiedatexactly6:23 ibeganthenightmare. my breathe is real. heaving. in. and. out. the cycle. your bodies rotting. my breath is real. i am not dead. she killed you. my breath is real. there were so many fragments . more pieces than space available. fragmented. my breath is a lie. it tells none ov what i truly am. you are cursed with life. she crippled you. my breath is a lie. you will never be released. she tied you down. my breath is a lie. i cried. i cried to the voices in my head. let it end. please. let it end.